She moved out while her man was out of town. They had been having problems for a long time. She left a letter behind detailing why it hadn't worked and why she was leaving. She took her stuff and left.
She was angry she emailed, because she had not heard from him. She said it was not like she wanted him to come after her,(?) she just couldn't believe that after four years he would not have called to check on her, see where she was living or that she was OK. I emailed her that if he was the kind of man who would be calling to talk or check on her she probably wouldn't have left.
He may call her at some point when he realizes she's really gone. I'm sure he thinks it's another breather. She's always been the one working harder to try and make the relationship work than he was. She may have to go back for yet another round. I think we have to do it over and over 'til we get it, however long that is. He took her letter at face value, for now, she's gone. I wish I could tell her differently but I don't think he's changing.
He knows why it hasn't worked, without reading the letter. She's told him over and over many times. My friend is the one that needs to realize it's time to fold 'em. He wasn't willing to do what she needed, that's clear. As long as she's the only one continuing to try and to take up all the slack, it won't work.
She's still hoping he'll see the light, realize what a good thing he had, come get her and they'll work it all out. I've been there. It's like you're circling in a holding pattern. You're hoping he'll come back with some lightening striking new understanding, his heart filled with love and you'll live happily ever after. Not gonna happen. They've been back and forth and round and round too many times with no change.
This is where, as Kenny says, "You gotta to know when to hold 'em and know when to fold 'em." HOLD YOUR SPACE
Let go, get over the hump and you'll see things for what they are.
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