I met a beautiful woman from Nairobi today who told me the story of her captive heart. She was tall and willowy with velvety brown skin and large doe eyes, perfect teeth and little to smile about. Her hair was short and cut stylishly close to her head. She tells me she is "desperately" in love with a man who lies to her. She is caught in the vortex of a love triangle. Much like The Bermuda, it seems (to her) there is no way out. But alas, "...there is", I tell her, "tho' painful it will be." To free herself from the drug of her love addiction will be a monumental task. On the verge of kicking him out, she tells me how much she is in love with him. He is the only man she wants. Her fear is that he will marry the other woman. The other woman has told him he cannot come back until he marries her. Surely it would be a life wrought with misery. I ask her why she would want a man who lies to her and is with another woman? She said simply, she has "... a captive heart." Why is it we think love equals so much pain?
My spiritual teacher once told me, the height of your joy is equal to the depth of your pain.
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It just occured to me that in my little world this type of addiction is acceptable, even somewhat noble. Oh to love sooooo much, what a great, self sacrificing, good person I am, always putting another before myself. Pretty soon, self is gone, vamoose, dissappeared from reality- the person he fell in love with has vanished.Disappointments galore, expectations unfufilled, Dont ever forget what kind of music you love or what your favorite color is..
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